While many of us get on with our routinely cooking tasks, two people will get married. Getting married at half past seven would seem a bit weird here, but thats not the only weird thing going on... The world has succumbed to madness, a third of it, or 2billion people, will be watching two people get married. One could ask how the hell they will all fit into the abbey, well the majority have been given plenty of room in personal couches and enough wine to forget the fact that those getting married are people they've never met nor will do. I have to confess I find it quite tacky. If someone payed for my upbringing, education and salary, I would have the courtesy to invite them to my wedding. Well actually the vast majority of those who care are spending there own money on wine in their own couches- it is a shame they weren't invited. Those who have have had the luck to live the same easy life.
I wasn't invited either I'm not going to lie. I've invested lots in the royal family- mostly unknowingly. It seems I owe them something. My right to live under laws and all that. I think I'm paying them because they are so kind they decided to give me some personal freedoms once. They have the right to do that you see, they aren't your ordinary people- they are special. They are our representatives. I've never met them nor can I ever pick up the phone to talk to them. Every now and then though, when they take a walk they are kind enough to say hello. Not to me but to some mad people who decided to live on the streets for a couple of days just to see what the experience is like. It is hard is all I can tell them. Not that I have. It is good to see people be compassionate though- it is good to see people put themselves in the shoes of the homeless who have to sleep on the floors everyday.
If you don't care too much about this person getting married, you may be arrested for wanting to have some fun- a loud party in central London on a Friday. Whilst most Fridays thsi would be perfectly fine, we must remember it is still daylight and British are all too traditional to be caught drinking before 4.
Too traditional too to get rid of an old piece of furniture that doesn't allow one to open the door fully. This massive object is a nuisance. It is expensive to keep in the room- it costs me too much to keep clean. It doesn't allow me to use my room as I wish and it has been here for bloody 1500 years. Everytime I raise my nose I catch a whiff of it that makes me cough. The thick musty smell looms over my room as I am sitting in this bed. Its dark shape holds so many cracks it can only have a hundred thousand diseases harbouring within it. I look at the computer screen wondering why I still have such a piece of furniture. There is the old there, blocking my door with a thick layer of dust I cannot possibly clean by myself and there is this computer- not too new but it whirrs and whizzes. If only I could use the new to get rid of the old by myself...
If I had a tv, it would probably be behind the big object anyhow so what's the point?
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